Wednesday, May 5, 2010

10 Opiniones Personales


1. ¿En serio el cable de mi laptop es más corto que mi pierna?

2. La calle frente a casa está más jodía que la cara de SEAL.

3. La próxima vez que alguien justifique ligarse a una mujer diciéndome que "es que ella tiene algo", le contestaré: "exacto, ese algo es coloquialmente conocido como 'el crico'".

4. Cuando meo en un inodoro que ya tiene meau', me da como una pestecita a popcorn. Me encanta esa pendejá.

5. La próxima vez que alguien se queje por un peo que TÚ te tiraste, ofrécele una solución. Dile: "imagínate que el que se tiró el peo fuiste tú". Alomejor se lo huela bien cabrón ahí.

6. No hay nada más liberante que trastearteL bicho bien cabrón frente a to' el mundo cuando te entra la piquiña.

7. Las flores van a dejar de encantarle a tu mujer cuando le metas un ramillete de rosas por el culo. Las rosas tienen espinas yeah.

8. ¿Porqué es que la gente con mal aliento se empeñan en hablarte super de foquin cerca?

9. Me soplé tanto la nariz que boté sangre por el culo.

10. ¿Alguna vez has tratado de devolver un moco a la nariz? ¡No se quedan pegaus' ni pal' carajo! Este fenómeno es impresionante particularmente porque los mocos son algo súmamente pegajoso y gomoso. Tan pegajosos, que cuando trato de fliquiarlos con el dedo índice, se me pegan a la uña del dedo. Entonces, cuando trato de fliquiarlo con otro dedo, se me pega a ese nuevo dedo. Esto no para hasta que me de por vencido y coloque el moco debajo de una superficie sólida.

90 comments:

Anonymous said...

Lucky 7! Yo tu no estuviera tan seguro de este statement! Aun me siguen gustando las flores! Alguien dijo espinas?

Cooki3 said...

1- N/A
2- Pues esta BIEN jodia, ese tipo si vieras la esposa te quedas en shock como una mujer asi puede estar con un tipo tan horrible
3- N/A
4- Menos mal q no me gusta el popcorn pq sino se me hubieran ido los antojos
5- Jajajaja super funny, eso o sino discimuladamente hecha spray pero a la persona
6- Yo detesto verlos hacer eso!!! parece como si no se hubieran ba~au
7- Sabes q dijeron q hay un video en youtube de unos medicos sacandole un padrino del ano a un tipo?
8- Y q tu me dices de l@s viej@s q apestan a zombie? misma peste de boca pero en todo el cuerpo
9- Co~o pues te la soplaste bien duro!!
10- Te imagine cuando chiquito en vez de pegar los chicles al pupitre por debajo, pegando los mocos y oliendo pega

Una vez mas me rei con co leyendo tus ocurrencias, triunfo masivo.

Anonymous said...

ay kbronq mucho me hiciste reir....no se si la cripi q me fume antes ayudo...

JRDJL said...

Eso es asi, la gente que le apesta la boca te hablan bien pegao...Y lo mas cabron es que te hablan y te aguantan...Para que no te escapes...

dark_Coqui said...

Tal vez todo el que te habla le apesta la boca, pero solo te das cuenta de los que te hablan bien pegao

JavierOmar said...

La gente que es megaobsesiva en lavarse los dientes y la boca limpia le apesta la boca. Tendrán perlas pero cuando abren el hocico huele a crustáceo.

Fumorcilla said...

TRINFO y mi opinion es: Pa sabel si te gusta una tipa.....cierra los ojos e imaginatela CAGANDO !!!!!!

Fumorcilla said...

Nerdote: o sea.....la pro'xima vez que te vayas a soplar algo....soplate el culo pa'ver si te sangra la nariz. buaahahahahha. go fuck yourself. piece a shit. Love ya

Alkarah José Hirán said...

El que niega un peo niega un hijo.

Fumorcilla said...

Alkara...that is fuckin funny bro!

Ms. Conciencia said...

Alkarah tiene razón. Y acuédense de que es mejor perder una amistad a perder una tripa. Y créanme que yo amo mis tripas.

Anonymous said...

jajajajaa mega funny tas mas kbron q spiderman!

Robi said...

:D

Sé que las caritas encojonan, pero no tengo nada más que decir...

Oye, el fenómeno ese que te sacas con mucho esfuerzo un moco pegajosos de la nariz no vuelven a pegarse a la nariz es interesante, ¿habrá algún estudio al respecto?

Anonymous said...

Habla claroooo!!
que paveraaaaaaa!!
jajajajajaja
t guillas!!

ESOEZ said...

Wow mano, pompiaera con este post!!

No sabía q iba a tripiar tanto pero se lo leí al tío mio q estudió biología (pero tiene una ferretería) y le pareció gracioso.

Lucila said...

Dude, límpiate los espejuelos que los tienes sucios. ;)

Morriñosa said...

Mis opiniones...
1. Depende cuan largo tu desees que sea
2.Es el privilegio de vivir en Puertorro.
3. 'Coloquialmente' es un disparate, pero te la perdono. No se le puede encontrar 'algo' mas a alguien si solo lo que quieres hacer es chingarte a la persona.
4. Me gusta el olor del meao cuando se seca en un mahon.
5. Eso no me lo puede decir mi perra a mi, quien lleva tirandose peos desde que empece a escribir este comment y me tiene envenena. Es verdad que si te tiras un peo adentro de una sabana y no tienes mas oxigeno que no sea ese gas, te mueres?
6. Quisiera ser un animal para poder rascarme libremente sin que la gente me critique solo se rian.
7. A las rosas se le pican las espinas, excepto por las bien pequeñas, que pueden ser una jodienda, como un nacío cerca del culo o una astilla micro entre medio del deo indice y el deo malo.
8. A veces me pregunto, "Coño tambien me apestara la boca a mi?" Que carajo se come la gente pa' que le apeste la boca asi?
9. Wau, mano entonces puedes oler tu mierda cuando sale?
10. Esto lo pense, las líneas de las huellas dactilares tambien ayudan a que no lo puedas flickear facilmente. Lo que yo hago es que los estrujo en los jeans hasta que estan duritos y busco a quien flickearselos...

Hazme café en las Bolas said...

Cabron entra y comenta mis new post!

Nerdote said...

Morriñosa: buen review de la lista lol.

Anonymous said...

haaaa lo de poner el moco duro y meterle a alguien con el me tripio mucho hahahahah yo tambien lo hago!! hahahaha

Anonymous said...

pa que el moco pegue debe tener la superficie limpia,como pa pegar resina de plástico(bondo)debes secar el área de la nariz y el moco le pegas un blower pa que se ponga pegajoso y luego pega con senda facilidad.Ya lo hice y en verdad queda cabrón pq lo pones donde quieras y to el mundo q le hables se incomoda ;)

Nerdote said...

Osea que le has pasado blower a un moco?

Darko said...

1. nunca he chekiao eso.
2. ninguna carretera merece tal insulto.
3. eso pasa cabron, es que simplemente, "tienen algo", en serio!
4. npi.
5. los mios apestan a carajo.
6. pero mejor es hacerlo cuando te pica el mismo centro del culo, casi dentro del roto ya. la gente te mira con asombro porque te admiran.
7. lo has probado ya?
8. mano tenia un supervisor asi. una vez le pusimos un coso de olor de los que enchuflas en un receptaculo de corriente, dentro de su oficina porque no solamente era su boca, era todo el que apestaba, y apestaba toda la oficina.
9. hoy yo bote sangre por la nariz por sacarme los mocos salvajemente. es en serio.
10. no lo he tratado, pero eso de los dedos me pasa hasta que lo pongo debajo del escritorio/silla de mi trabajo.

Nerdote said...

"9. hoy yo bote sangre por la nariz por sacarme los mocos salvajemente. es en serio."

JAjajajaaj

Moncho Arzuaga said...

oye es raro que nadie dijo las opiniones son como los culos: todos tenemos uno. So there.

Nerdote said...

o no! Yo una vez conocí a una tipa q no tienía culo. Pero hablaba una mieLda cabrona.

DollWar said...

voy a imprimir la foto de nerdo y la voy a poner en mi ba~o. hace el mismo efecto que leer revistas. how cute.

Nerdote said...

Si haces eso porfavor procura tomarle una foto a todo el montaje.

AMARGUETE said...

IM BACK, por que me gusta el post lo que no me gusta no lo comento
Bueno Vamos al grano
El # 3 definitivamente cuando un cabron dice algo asi es por que el hijo de puta no tiene los cojones masculinos de decir que se la quiere clavar y ya es que se averguenza en frente de los panas el pendejo. Lo mejor del mundo es hablar claro y decir mira me la clave por que estaba bien bellaco y que se joda como cuando a uno le toca una guayo face o una curvy fatty pero no te la tocaste te la frotaste con una vagina YEAH eso es a lo que yo me refiere CHORRO E CABRONES !

AMARGUETE said...

Se me olvido lo de la boca apestosa. La verdad so canto e cabron esa gente necesita apoyo o tu crees que no se han dado cuenta de que alguno de sus panas dicen coño a este cabron o cabrona siempre le apesta la boca bien duro. Esa gente mejor es uno buscar algo en internet un consejo casero o un remedio y hablarle claro y decirle mira broki trata esto por que la verdad es que siempre te huele la boca a pedazito de carne estancado en una muela cabron trata esto y esto otro para que le des un par de alternativas y el sepa que tiene tu apoyo y que no eres un cabron hipocrita que te lo tripeas en las espaldas y no lo ayudas eso es ser un amigo CHORRO E CABRONES !

Fumorcilla said...

La # 6 es mi preferida. Yo ando por ahi con una manita de esasChinas pa' rascarte la espalda...pero la verdad es que a mi siempre me entra piqui~a en el bicho asi q uso la manita pa' rajcalme el caricortao'. Mo lo rajsco en la parada de guagua, cuando estoy en la EAP...en to' sitio me pica y ma rajco con la manita......Es que el bicho, el caricortao, el baboso, el que escupe SIEMPRE PICA ..~eta!!!!

Anonymous said...

diablo deberian hacer una aplicacion pal Iphone q le diga a la gente si le apesta la boca y asi el mundo seria mas feliz

ESOEZ said...

Amarguete: fíjate, yo creo q esa gente q le apesta la boca, viven ignorantes hacia el hecho de la peste y nadie suele confrontarlos con la verdad. BTW,qué bueno verte por estos lares, pensaba que YA NET te pasasen borders na' más. TRIUNFO!

FUMO: cabrón yo también tengo una manita desas!! Qué rico es rascarse el bicho con esas pendejaces!!

Anónimo: si te lo inventas te haces milonario.

Magdiel said...

Los mocos estan cabrones loco.

Morriñosa said...

Sobre lo de la peste, si se lo mencionas, se sienten mal, se aislan y no hablan con nadie. Me paso con un chamaco en el coro, que audiciono para una cancion y tenia una peste como a goma chilla y algo abombao en la boca, asqueroso. Se lo dije, y me dijo "No soy el unico" justificandose, y yo pienso "Pero cabron es tu boca, que se jodan los demas!"

Rolfs said...

o no! Yo una vez conocí a una tipa q no tienía culo. Pero hablaba una mieLda cabrona.

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